Manners are an extremely important part of being an effective sales person. When a sales person has insufficient or bad manners, this can repel the sales prospect away along with that potential sale, so it is worthwhile to spend a few minutes on the subject of manners. Let’s start with the definition of etiquette.
Etiquette
1. (Sociology) the customs or rules governing behavior regarded as correct or acceptable in social or official life
2. (Sociology) a conventional but unwritten code of practice followed by members of any of certain professions or groups medical etiquette [from French, from Old French estiquette label, from estiquier to attach; see stick2] From Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged
Wikipedia says: Etiquette is a code of behavior that delineates expectations for social behavior according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or group. “Today’s Etiquette”, published back in1941 by DoubleDay Doran and written by Lillian Eichler. It reads: “Good manners are not only indispensable in society, but they have a very practical value in the business world.”
Based on these definitions, we can see that manners or etiquette play a large role in business and especially in sales. Whether you are in sales or a social situation, “Talking too much” for example would not be considered good manners. But this is done by sales people all the time as per our worldwide survey you have read about.
Good manners and communication skills work together for sales people
Have you ever met someone who “thought they knew everything” already and never showed interest in you or your ideas? How did this make you feel? Did you want to continue talking with them? Sales people, who just assume they already know everything without bothering to truly give importance to the ideas of the prospective client, will not be successful.
The sales person that “knows it all” fails to truly look or listen to the prospective client and because they do not look or listen they do not see or hear. The result is that the sales person leaves the meeting thinking that the meeting went great and the prospective client will definitely call them, however, that call will never come in!
So, if you have ever wondered why your prospective client doesn’t call you back, then this is the information you have been looking for! The above point is a major cause for a prospective client not returning your calls after your first contact either by phone or a meeting in person.
The prospective client needs to feel that they are important in order to start to be comfortable and trust you. It is otherwise bad manners to fail to give the prospective client importance and will end up in the sale going nowhere.
If you or your sales team have difficulty consistently getting a prospective client to get back into communication with you after the initial call or meeting, the cause is likely a lack of truly looking, hearing and understanding the prospective client in the first place.
As a test or exercise, ask yourself or sales person what you learned about the prospective client in the initial meeting. If you truly were looking and listening, there will be a full profile of the prospective client, their ideas and a good understanding of how they feel and what they are interested in.
Bad manners when meeting someone for the first time
If you meet someone for the first time, do you normally have a pre-setup focus on getting that person to do something for you? Are you working from a pre-determined agenda? Following a script? So why would you have a pre-determined agenda when you are doing your sales job and meeting a prospective client for the first time?
Here’s an example of a communication happening for the first time that is not very effective the majority of the time:
“Hi, my name is ‘___’ and I would like to go to dinner with you tomorrow night. I already know you will like me very much because many other people like me and I can see already that you are a nice person who would like to go to dinner with me.” Likely this would not work as your opening statement.
So why do this same thing when you meet your prospective client for the first time? Here’s a similar example of a communication happening with your prospective client for the first time:
“Hi my name is ‘____’ and I would like you to buy my product or service. I already know that you will like my product because many other people like my product and I can see already that you are a nice person who likes good products and services like mine.”
Clearly, this is not the most effective approach a sales person can take!
Good manners when meeting someone for the first time:
Use good manners, just like you would if you were introduced to someone by a friend for the first time. Take the example if a good friend of yours stopped by your home and brought a guest with them. What would you do? Introduce yourself, offer the person a drink and take care to ensure they were comfortable in your home. This would be good manners and leads to further communication. Next you might find out how they know your friend, what they do for a job or what their interests are.
This again would be caring for them to ensure they are comfortable and being truly interested in them. You would listen to what this person was saying and try to understand their point of view. You would even ask more questions to clarify and understand them better. You would do all of this without expectations or demands on them or any agenda in mind other that really understanding their point of view. This is good manners in life.
By the way, it is also exactly what you should do when meeting your client for the first time. Be yourself when meeting people for the first time, clients or friends. You should not become the “Sales Super person” or the “Sales Samurai” when meeting a client. People like YOU, not “you being someone else”. Believe me, people can tell the difference between a person that is genuine, trustworthy and truly caring and a person that is fake and only trying to “SELL”.
In summary, good etiquette and manners are a critical part of salesmanship and should be part of your continuous improvement system for yourself and your sales team. I wish you and your sales team lots of success.
© 2013 SELLability Technologies LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Thanks so much for the helpful hints! You put it so clearly and easy to understand!!
Yes! We focus on simplicity and doing what works. We are happy you found them useful!
Good Manners apply to all of our communications with others.
Exactly right! Imagine a world where everyone in it learned, understood and used manners in every communication. What a different world it would be! In the case of sales, it can mean the difference between a close and a walk.
Thank You for the helpful examples! I find it very true, when we respect other people they respect us.
This is great information! Very useful. Making a friend and building trust is so important. Thank you.
be yourself, don’t try to be someone else. to be trusted it is very important to be real at the base.
Thank you for your comment. We all can sense when there is artificiality at work. Being yourself is the way to real success.